“Honesty and transparency make you vulnerable. Be honest and transparent anyway.” – Saint Mother Teresa of Calcutta
My stomach and heart ache as Rachel and I talk on the phone tonight. Actually, they have been in knots for a few days now whenever this subject has come up. I love that this partnership has allowed us to be closer. I love that it requires us to talk regularly even though we’re both trying to find a happy balance. But I don’t love these kinds of calls. Tonight, we had to make one of the toughest decisions to-date. One we will undoubtedly have to make again.
We have always told our brides that we love to meet them in person or over video chat before they make a decision so we can learn more about their love story, what they envision on their wedding day, and share our story with them. We are people-centered photographers. We don’t book weddings for the money. We don’t book weddings for the excitement (although, I do love that part.) We don’t book them to say we’ve booked another one.
We book weddings because we love to see tears in our brides eyes when her father sees her for the first time. We love to see Grandma squeeze her grandsons arm a little harder today because she’s so proud of the woman he chose. We love to watch flower girls gaze at the bride hoping she will get a photo with the “princess.” We love the way the groomsman sit (mostly) patiently until it’s their turn then joke with us during the photos since they know its what groomsman do. We love grand entrances and disco lights and DJ’s named BBBBBBBob (Buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-Bob). We love the moment when the pastor asks the congregation to bow their heads and pray…and we pray with them.
The wedding day is arguably the MOST. IMPORTANT. DAY. of your life. Your photographers are with you THE. ENTIRE. DAY. You must like them. You must trust them. We believe that the people you choose to spend your time and money on should be the right ones.
Tonight, Rachel and I had to turn down our first bride and groom. We loved the couple. We loved the mom. We had so many connections with them. But we were not the right photographers for them. We knew in our hearts we would not be true to ourselves if we booked and shot their wedding. I am uneasy tonight from this vulnerability. My heart aches that the bride & groom and their mother know that our words are so sincere when we tell we wish them nothing but the best. We hope they understand the decision is genuine. We hope that with the closing of this door, another one opens…for them and for us.
With all our love,